Quotes #7

The freshest batch of random quotes overheard in the ER:




Rob:  “I’d rather bad pizza than good kimchi”




Nurse:  “Well, no, I mean, I’m really getting much older”

Rob:  “Is there anyone ever who can’t make that statement?”





Patient:  “How do you know I’m not having a seizure right now?  You don’t know me!”





Resident:  “Britain is great.  You can say just about anything, and it means getting drunk.  I’m going to get pajama’d right after work!”





Patient:  “Am I gonna be seen soon?  I already died three times so far!”





PA:  “Fricking  doctor ‘(female doctor)’!  This is all her fault.  I’m going to go dislocate her vagina!”





Patient:  “I can’t see my teeth.  I’m going to go kill myself with Big Macs!”





PA:  “She has 50 squamous cells in her urine.  That’s like someone put a PUC on that 76 y/o female…”




Nurse:  “No, no, no, you need to choke it harder!”





Patient:  “In the name of science, you made me f&#*ing pee! (happily)”





CT tech:  “Tell him it will be warm in his throat and groin”

Doc:  “If I had a dollar for every time I heard that…”





Doc:  Vacation was great, but the kids got up at 5 am everyday

Nurse: Why’d they get up at 5 am?

Doc:  Because they hate me.






Nurse:  “Man, today is just the day of testicles.  I’m so glad I don’t have a pair.”





Tech:  “You know you’re exhausted when you pull a dead patients IV out and hold pressure for an extended period of time…”




Nurse:  “Oh him?  He was here yesterday.  He pooped on the floor.”



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