Coffee, my anti-drug


coffeeHave you ever filled a full punch card at Bigby coffee?

I have.

They give you a free coffee. Any flavor, any size.

The guy at the counter said that I might as well just get the biggest size with an extra shot of espresso, you know, since it’s free.  I have a tendency to drink anything in my hand quickly, even if it is scalding.  Caffeine, after all, is my drug of choice.

For a short period of time I was able to watch individual photons of light as they slowly drifted down from the sun. The world slowed down and I could do anything.

I kind of felt like this:

After the initial blast wore off, though, I actually had a pretty productive day.

The reason I mention this is not because I love coffee.  To be honest, I’m not a huge fan of the taste.  In fact, I get my coffee so dressed up it can only be called a distant bastard second cousin of actual coffee.  I’ll get the peppermint mocha with sprinkles and estrogen, thank you very much.  Oh, what is that? Pink sprinkles?  Sure, dump on a fist full just for kicks.

But Caffeine is my drug of choice.

This just made me wonder, though.  Do any of the harder, street drugs have dolled up alternatives?

Is there menthol crack-cocaine for when you don’t want that burned cracky taste?

Is there Chocolate-raspberry pot without that dank musty garbage smell?

Is there crystal meth that just tastes like Skittles so you can really taste the Rainbow?

Just curious.

 

I asked my resident I worked with (he prefers to be called “Go do my pelvic exams for me”), and he states he preferred birthday cake oreos.

I guess we all have our vices.

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